Catastrophe Kitchen | Buttermilk Biscuits and Sausage Gravy

My kiddo loves this breakfast above all others—and it’s surprisingly easy to make. Tender, flaky biscuits and creamy sausage gravy give you plenty of energy to tackle even the busiest of days! You can make the biscuits through the butter-cutting stage and put the mix in the fridge overnight to make the next morning’s breakfast even faster, if you’d like. And the baked biscuits freeze well—sometimes I’ll assemble the leftovers into breakfast sandwiches, then wrap them individually in parchment and freeze in a ziplock for easy heat-and-go meals.A couple of general tips for biscuits: use very cold butter (and buttermilk) and handle the dough as little as possible. The butter needs to be very cold to give biscuits the layers they need, and even the heat of your hands can warm it up considerably (which is why I don’t rub the butter in with my fingers, like some people do). Stirring the dough too much will also make your biscuits tough. So the moral of the story is….do as little as possible. It’s the easy way AND the proper way.Here's what you’ll need:For the biscuits:3 C flour2 t sugar2 t baking powder1 t salt½ t baking soda1 stick very cold butter (4 oz)1 ½ C buttermilk½ stick butter for brushing the topsFor the sausage gravy:1 lb pork sausage½ stick butter (2 oz)¼ C flour3 C whole milk8 sage leaves12 grinds of pepper (about 1 tsp, but you can adjust to taste)1 pinch red pepper flakes¼ t paprika1 t saltFirst things first: Turn the oven on to 400F and measure your flour into a large bowl.We’re going to deal with the butter first, putting it in the freezer to cool down just a little bit more before we use it. Cube your butter by cutting it in half lengthwise, then in half lengthwise again, then into cubes. (Mine looks like more because I made a double batch—I always like to put extra biscuits in the freezer.)Toss the butter cubes into the flour bowl (just on top of it), then pull the butter cubes out. This is just to keep them from sticking to each other.Put them into a small container in the freezer while you get the rest of your ingredients ready.Add the baking powder, sugar, salt, and soda to the bowl with your flour, and whisk to combine.I like to get out my gravy ingredients at this point and get them situated near the stove, so do that now. This also gives the butter a chance to cool down a bit more before you proceed.Chop the sage leaves finely and set aside with the rest of the ingredients.Grease a 9”x9” square baking pan with bacon grease (or melted butter if you don’t have bacon grease). I used a half sheet pan since I was doing a double batch.Now you can finish the biscuits and get them in the oven. Pull out your handy pastry cutter (or two knives, or a food processor if you’re fancy) and add the butter cubes to the flour mix. Quickly cut (or process) just until the butter is no longer in large pieces. Stop when you have some pieces that are about the size of a pencil eraser or a pea, some that are smaller, but not many larger than that. This will take a few minutes with a pastry cutter, or about 10 1-second pulses on a food processor.Shake your buttermilk, then pour it into the middle of your bowl.Gently fold the buttermilk in (scooping up from the bottom and sides of the bowl with a spatula) just until the liquid is no longer standing in the bowl—WELL before you get a fully incorporated dough. If you’re using a food processor, 2-3 pulses should do it. Mine looked like this.Flour your countertop, then flip the bowl’s contents onto the counter. See how mine still has some floury spots and even some wet spots? Totally fine.Flour your hands, then roughly pat the dough together, like this.Fold one half of the dough onto the other half, like this.It looks super shaggy and wrong right now, but trust me, it will be okay. Pat the dough with your hands (don’t roll it!) to about an inch thick, then repeat the folding and patting again. Your dough should start looking more homogenous.At this point, I don’t have photos, because my hands were 100% covered in biscuit dough. But after two folds, your dough should be sticking together pretty well. At this point, you can just cut the dough in half and stack one half on top of the other instead of folding it. Then pat the dough down to about an inch thick. Repeat this cutting and patting process one more time. This will give your biscuits lots of beautiful layers.Pat the dough into a square or rectangle about ½” high and cut the dough with a sharp knife into squares about 2”x2”. If you want round biscuits, make sure you use a sharp biscuit or cookie cutter, and push straight down. If the cutter is too dull or you twist the cutter as you press, it will seal the edges of the biscuit, preventing it from rising properly.My dough rectangle was a little more rounded because I don’t really care, so I had to kind of moosh two weird corner biscuits into one biscuit. If you’re Very Aesthetic, make sure your dough is squared (you can even trim the edges if you want). If you’re more of a swamp monster like me, you don’t have to be as fussy. The little corner biscuits are crunchier, and I sneak them out of the pan and eat them with butter and jam before I even call people to the table.If you like soft-sided biscuits, put them close enough together to touch. If you like your biscuits a little flakier (like I do), place them a scant ½” apart.Put the pan in the oven and set a timer for 15 minutes.Put a half stick of butter in a microwaveable-safe bowl and nuke for about 30 seconds, or until it is melted. Set aside.Now you can start your gravy!Put a pan (cast iron is preferable) over high heat. When the pan is quite hot, add the sausage, breaking it up with a wooden spoon or spatula. Reduce the heat to medium-high. Let the sausage cook for a minute or two, then start stirring it up to cook it evenly. You should get some browning on the sausage, but not a ton.Once the sausage is no longer pink, add the butter and let it melt. When the butter is melted, sprinkle the flour on top of the sausage and stir to combine.Let it cook for about one minute, then add the milk, salt, and pepper, stirring to scrape up any bits on the bottom.Let the gravy cook, stirring occasionally, until it thickens. When the gravy is thick enough to bubble lazily, add the sage, paprika, and red pepper flakes, and stir to combine.Let the gravy continue to cook until it is thick and creamy, then reduce heat to lowest setting just to keep it warm (you can turn off the heat and let the residual heat of the cast iron keep it warm, as well). I usually let it continue to do its thing while I clean up.When the timer beeps for your biscuits, pull them out, brush them with the melted butter, and pop them back in the oven for 3—5 minutes, or until the tops are browning nicely and the butter is gone.Everything is ready! Serve up the best breakfast you’ve had in a long time.